Archive for lonley

After Valentines Day

Posted by Anjana Lala on
 February 15, 2018
after valentines day

After Valentines day, were you one of the many incredible and amazing people that had an awful Valentine’s day. I can feel your pain and hurt. Did you dread the day and felt like it was the longest day that would just not end?

Are you feeling not good enough because you did not get flowers, chocolates or gift? No one declared their undying love for you! Do you feel like there is something wrong with you? That is BS. Biggest lie that we tell ourselves. These are all the negative thoughts and feelings we have about ourselves. I have made it my passion to replace: I am not good enough with positive thoughts and vibes.

One way of doing this is using positive affirmations. If you want to up your feel-good factor and confidence I suggest adding positive affirmations to your daily routine. They must be personal, feel sacred and special for you.

I have included my top 10 positive affirmations below as encouragement to create a powerful sentence that inspires you.

  • I love and accept myself just the way I am today
  • I am powerful now. I can achieve anything I put my mind to.
  • I accept and approve of my body
  • I am intelligent, capable and competent
  • I believe in myself and free to be me
  • I trust myself to make good choices in life
  • I allow and give myself permission to receive good things in my life
  • I am completely open to new experiences in life.
  • I am loving lovable and loved
  • I am worthy of love, joy and abundance

How to use your affirmation:

  1. Sit in a quiet place comfortably
  2. Take a deep breath in for a count of 4.
  3. Hold the breath for a count of 4.
  4. Slowly exhale for a count of 6 as you say the affirmation in your mind.
  5. Repeat this process 3 times to invite each affirmation to resonate and vibrate into your mind and body.

Observe your thoughts and feelings during the exercise. Any time you notice a negative thought pattern or feeling, repeat your affirmation. At the end of your session, repeat the breathing exercise you started with. Just breath 3 times – no affirmations. This will help internalise and reinforce your affirmations.

This entire process is to build confidence that your thoughts, feelings and your actions are in alignment.

Reflections…

Reality of life:  People will come and go.  Events will come and go.  Day and night will come and go.  But deep unconditional love for yourself will always remain with you, if you nurture and nourish it. Make it one of your most important priority in life.

Over to YOU…

How are positive affirmations working for you? Do you use affirmations in your life?

Let us know in the comment section

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How to Cope with Valentines Day?

Posted by Anjana Lala on
 February 13, 2018
valentines-day

Valentines day! Day of hearts, chocolates and flowers.

But its not all rosy for many people. It’s a traumatic and sad for many. The expectation set out by commercial establishments had people waiting in anticipation. Only to have their hearts broken. I was one of the people who fell for the glamour/illusion of Valentine’s day. My heart was ripped to pieces. Have you had a similar experience? Well let me tell you.

Do you know that you’re very special and unique? There is no other person like you. You deserve to be loved by the most important person in your life — YOU. We are celebrating the month of love starting with YOU.

(YOU MATTER YOU SMART YOU KIND YOU POWERFUL YOU ♥ HEART)

Practicing self-love can be tough for many of us, especially when it Valentines. There is so much emphasis on romantic love. It can be extremely lonely. The void and the emptiness are amplified. Your self-worth gets a knock and you feel so rejected by life.

Does that seem or sound like you? We are focusing on YOU and loving you. It’s not about being self-absorbed or self-centred, it’s about getting in touch with ourselves, our well-being and our joy. We practice self-love, so we can break through our limiting beliefs. When you love yourself so deeply and unconditionally, magic happens. The loneliness and low self-worth disappears. You get so comfortable in your own skin that you do not need love and approval from outside. You may be wondering where to begin.

Below are 21 ways to love yourself: –loving yourself

 

 

 

  1. Start being honest with yourself about everything going on in your life.
  2. Accept where are right now in your life – without judgement
  3. Connect with your inner self and higher self
  4. Face your inner resistance, barriers and fears
  5. Be kind, compassionate towards yourself
  6. Forgive yourself and others
  7. Make peace with your past
  8. Start enjoying the things and relationships you already have
  9. Start dreaming and doing
  10. Start creating your own happiness – on your terms
  11. Build and nurture relationships where you feel appreciated and loved. Where you feel safe to be open and vulnerable
  12. Become the love you seek from other people
  13. Pay attention to your stress/worry/tension/anxiety levels and find ways to manage the stress/worry/tension/anxiety.
  14. Be yourself, genuinely and proudly
  15. Nurture and nourish your body
  16. Take care of your time, your space and your finances.
  17. Laugh more in life
  18. Find work and activities you love and that adds joy and meaning
  19. Believe in your abilities
  20. Find the positive during challenging times
  21. Flaunt your Flawsomeness!

Reflections….

Reality of life:  People will come and go.  Events will come and go.  Day and night will come and go.  But deep unconditional love for yourself will always remain with you, if you nurture and nourish it.

“Put these things on your TO-DO list today:

  1. Spend time doing things that help you love yourself more.
  2. Spend time with people who help you love yourself more.”

Over to YOU…

Are you ready to start loving yourself deeply and unconditionally?

15 Stress Busting Tips

Posted by Anjana Lala on
 April 12, 2017

15 Stress Busting Tips

Stress Busting is really needed in today’s fast paced world. Stress is something that everybody deals in their lives. The right dose of stress can actually be good for us. It can make us perform better when needed.

However, if you are in constant state of anxiety and stress it can begin to take its toll, physically, mentally and emotionally. To live a happy and healthy life we need to learn how to deal with stress effectively. I used to get stressed out about so many things, some of which were nothing to stress out about at all. Over the years though, I have learnt many techniques and tools that help me effectively deal with stressful times in my life.

So next time you feel that stress creeping in, try out some of my stress-busting tips. I’d love to share them with you, because although they might seem like common sense, you’d be surprised how many of them you simply aren’t doing.

My 15 Stress Busting Tips:  

  1. Manage your time effectively & Prep for tomorrow.
  2. Change to a healthy lifestyle – Eat, Exercise and Rest Well
  3. Know your limitations and learn to say NO
  4. Avoid unnecessary conflict
  5. Label your negative feelings causing stress – write it down.
  6. Unplug from cellphone, email, text messages, internet
  7. Accept the things you cannot change
  8. Laugh Out Loud
  9. Meditate to relieve stress
  10. Turn up the tunes and dance the stress away
  11. Take care of yourself  to recharge your batteries
  12. Recall one good thing that happened on that day.
  13. Find time to meet friends and have some fun
  14. Try to see things differently, develop a positive thinking style
  15. Avoid alcohol, nicotine and caffeine as coping mechanisms

Over to You

How do you manage your stress levels?

Please let us know. Don’t be shy. Insert your stress buster in the comments section. We would love to hear from you.

Build Your Confidence

Posted by Anjana Lala on
 October 5, 2016
Build your confidence

Building your confidence is an inside job.

The rock solid foundation that you seek comes from within. Not outside. Plenty has been written about building self-confidence – creating a plan, setting goals, finding the right mentor, etc. We taking a slightly different approach. The below will help build your confidence.

We believe these 7 things can help build confidence and roll with the punches.

  1. Do one thing that makes you feel uncomfortable.
  2. Fail fast and fail often.
  3. Be wrong and be OK with it.
  4. Compliment others to make them feel awesome
  5. Laugh in the face of frustration.
  6. Ignore what most people think of you.
  7.  Now is the Perfect Time to Do.

Your turn…

If you were able to maintain a level of self-confidence that no circumstance could shake, what would you be doing differently?

Also, what would you add to the list?  What has helped you build your confidence?

Please let us know by leaving a comment below.

10 Ways to Beat the Holiday Blues

Posted by Anjana Lala on
 December 14, 2015
10 ways to beat the holidays blues

Beat the Holiday Blues!

As the holiday season rolls in, we are overwhelmed by the impression we’re all supposed to be leaping into a constant stream of parties, big happy family dinners, and heaps of presents. Well, it’s been my experience that some holidays are busy and exciting, but some they’re not. Some years they’re bittersweet and some years they’re incredibly difficult. Whether it’s financial strain, family issues, illness, loss, loneliness or something else altogether, the season can be rough and tough! SIGH THE HOLIDAY BLUES

If the upcoming holiday season is looking to be tricky to navigate, here are a few alternatives to feeling blue. They’re definitely more fun than sighing into your coffee mug or packet of snack every time a Christmas commercial comes on TV. Oh yeah, I’ve been there too.

Let’s explore some interesting options to beat the holiday blues :

  1. Have a Get Together

Some years it’s just not possible to be with family during the holidays and it doesn’t mean you have to be alone. Instead of spending the day moping in your home, have an impromptu group dinner, which can turn into a great night of conversations and playing board games. So, if you think you’re alone because you can’t go home, think again. See what co-workers, neighbours, or friends are up to, and you may be surprised. There could be a communal holiday dinner waiting to happen.

  1. Be Creative Make something.

During the holidays all commercials convince us that holiday happiness = buy me buy me please buy me. We all know that’s not true, but it can still be hard to show up to holiday functions empty handed. Sometimes money is short, but that doesn’t mean you can’t do/make something special. It’s a great time to become creative. I have a friend who makes stunningly yummy chocolates, wraps them up, and hands them out as gifts. It’s like getting a big box of specialised gourmet chocolates, but instead of spending a lot of money, she uses her time and skill. Don’t be afraid about tapping into your talents to make gifts. Maybe you’re a baker: offer to bake cakes. Maybe you’re a gifted artist or a photographer. Paint something, sew something, frame something, bake something, craft something, whatever you’re good at, make it and share it.

  1. Get in touch with your home.

If you’re have no reason to celebrate the holidays, use your creative energy and extra time off to fix up your place. That’s what I did during one holiday season. I was going through some heartbreak (always fun around the holidays), working most of the holidays, my dad was recovering from major surgery and there was nothing particularly eventful to mark the days. Tired of sulking around, I decided to repaint my room. I picked up a 5 litre of paint at a local store, painted late into the night while listening to holiday music and drinking happy juice. It turned out to be a deep evening of introspection and I woke up the next morning (with stiff used muscles) in a freshly painted room. To my surprise, it felt like a small victory for me (moving on up).

  1. Get excited about the New Year: Dream BIG!

Even if nothing is wrong, some holidays are just kind of lifeless and there isn’t much going on. Instead of feeling blue get excited about things to do and places to go in the coming New Year. Connect with forgotten dreams. Dream new dreams. Envision all the possibilities. Draft plans. Having a trip, project or goal on the horizon can make those dull New Year’s Eves less of a bummer.

  1. Gift of Giving

This holidays do something different. Volunteer for a charity over the holidays. Ask friends to join you. For so many, the holidays are incredibly difficult because their basic needs are not met, and this is where we can help. Plenty organizations or companies are looking for volunteers to help with clothes, food, toy drives or meal-related events around the holidays. Google local opportunities to volunteer your time.

  1. Be a chum.

It’s easy to fall into a bad mood when times are tough, but chances are there’s probably someone you know who is having an even rougher time. Take a look around and see who could use a hand. Maybe a friend just lost a job or is going through a break-up: take them out to dinner or for a drink. Volunteer to babysit for someone you know desperately needs a night out. Put some extra cash in the coffee shop tip jar. Wink at a handsome old man. Compliment someone. Smile at a crabby store cashier, Greet the cleaning crew at the office, you get the gist. Little gestures can make a big impact on another person’s day, and you can boost your own mood just by being thoughtful. It’s a phenomenon called helper’s high, and it refers to your body’s natural release of happy hormones.

  1. Take a hike, Mike

I mean that in the nicest way possible, as in, truly, take a hike! Really, is there anything better than a long walk to clear your head? For me, that means wandering through the city listening to my favourite music with no destination in mind. For you that could mean hiking a favourite trail while listening to the rhythm of nature, or a solitary walk along the beach or silently through the botanical gardens. For some just browsing quietly through their favourite department store can be soothing.

  1. Travel – Local is Lekker.

Solo leisure travel during the holidays. I love this idea! If you have some extra money but no real plans, why not use the time off to go somewhere new somewhere exotic? A Spontaneous spot! Adventure is always a grand idea, and isn’t there something completely charming about Safari Lodges during the holidays? It’s like extreme coziness with a twist.

  1. Re-connect with a phone call or over coffee.

It is holiday season, so why not use this time to truly reconnect with a forgotten friend? We may be “friends” with everyone we’ve ever known online, but there is no real connection. It’s cold and impersonal. It’s safe and void of real meaningful conversations. It definitely doesn’t compare with hearing someone’s voice or catching up as you awkwardly eat complicated Indian meal with your hands at Raj Indian restaurant.

  1. Unplug

Unplug from text messages, social media and email. It is a major presence in our lives and it’s primarily an incredible tool for communicating and connecting. During the holidays social media can create additional anxiety and stress. Comparing with the Jones can a very lively activity during the holiday season. Sometimes the last thing we need to be thinking about is what fancy restaurants our friends are at or how fortunate someone is because they’re having the perfect party. Sometimes it’s helpful to not know what everyone else is up to. Just be present and enjoy your occasion or function.

It is the season to be jovial. You can make it so despite any hardship you may currently be facing. And, hey, if all else fails, there’s always eggnog spiked with rum, brandy, or bourbon! 🙂

Jokes aside, how do you beat the holiday blues?

Please share in the comments section

 

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